160+ Awesome Funny Monday Jokes to Get You Through the Week

Mondays are statistically the least favorite day of the week for most people!!

As we drag ourselves out of bed and into the workweek, a good laugh can be the perfect antidote to those Monday blues. 

In this article, we’ll explore a collection of hilarious Monday jokes, including the “Monday joke of the day” and some stupid funny jokes that are sure to brighten your morning. 

Get ready to discover some punny gems that will make you chuckle and help you kick off your week on a lighter note!

Short Monday Jokes

• Monday called. I hung up.
• Leaf me alone!! its Monday!!
•  My Monday motivation is just trying not to cry in public.
•  Mondays are the season finale of the weekend—and the cliffhanger is trauma.
•  I put the “meh” in Monday morning meetings.
• Whale…. Monday washed over again!!
•  I don’t rise and shine—I crawl and complain.
•  Monday walked in. My brain walked out.
• Rock solid tried this Monday!!
•  My blood type is caffeine-positive every Monday.
•  Mondays should be optional, like side salads or exercise.
•  Monday knocked. I pretended I wasn’t home.
• Charging into Monday full force like rhino!!
•  Mondays are like cold showers: shocking, unnecessary, and cruel.
•  I whispered “be gentle” to Monday. It wasn’t.
•  I was fine until Monday opened its email floodgates.
• Not saying Monday is evil, but it works in HR.
•  Every Monday I learn how to function without a soul.
•  Monday’s my gym coach—loud, early, and full of pain.
•  My goal this Monday? Lower expectations.
• Paw-lease , not another Mondat fetch!!
•  I’m not saying I hate Monday, but if it were a song, I’d skip it.
•  I asked my coffee if we’re in this together. It said, “Only for 20 minutes.”
•  Monday has resting boss face.
• Kicked into Monday like football penalties!!
•  Don’t talk to me until Tuesday.

Dumb Monday jokes

•  Mondays are my villain origin story.
•  My coffee’s strong, but Monday’s stronger.
•  Monday: now with 20% more existential crisis!
•  If Monday were a drink, it’d be lukewarm decaf.
•  Monday’s vibe: “Let’s ruin this together.”
• Loafing into Monday….knead coffee!!
•  I came. I saw. I went back to bed.
•  Mondays are like software updates—long, painful, and avoidable.
•  Woke up, chose “meh.”
• Al- dente pasta or not -Monday boils!!
•  Monday said “rise and grind.” I chose “grumble and sit.”
•  Not to brag, but I survived another Monday.
•  My brain on Monday is buffering.
• Burnt out already ?? its monday!!
•  Monday walked in like it pays my rent.
•  Mondays are introverted—they show up uninvited.
•  Woke up with a headache. Realized it was Monday.
•  I fought the yawn, and the yawn won.
•  Monday’s the human version of low battery.
•  Mondays smell like printer ink and lost dreams.
•  I’d rate Monday one star—do not recommend.
•  Monday’s hobby is ruining Sundays.
•  You can’t spell “dread” without “M-O-N.”

Funny Monday Jokes

•  If Monday had a face, I’d report it.
•  My weekend was a dream. Monday’s a jump scare.
•  Mondays demand a vibe I don’t have.
•  I blinked. Monday happened.
• Pun- believable Monday dad mood , as usual!!
•  Is “undone” a valid Monday mood?
•  Mondays are the sequel no one asked for.
• No one: … Me on Monday: “Can I not?”
•  Mondays are allergic to joy.
• Pie me a Monday break!!
•  There’s no “fun” in Monday. Not even a typo.
•  Monday left a voicemail. I deleted it.
•  Mondays make me want to live off the grid.
•  Monday: the true Final Boss.
• Bingo…. you guessed it—Monday!!!
•  I’m powered by sarcasm and coffee on Mondays.
•  Mondays are just reverse Fridays.
• Monday: because the universe said, “Try again.”
•  I’m emotionally out of office on Mondays.
•  Mondays should be on mute.
• Paw-sitively not ready for monday!!
•  Who scheduled Monday without asking me?
•  The forecast says 100% chance of Monday.
•  Monday is proof the weekend was a lie.

Monday Puns

•  Monday: nature’s alarm clock.
•  I survived… barely.
• Hey Cow…its Monday again!!
•  Mondays run on espresso and denial.
•  Blinked once. It’s Monday.
•  Hello darkness, my old Monday.
•  Coffee first. Emotions later.
•  Mondays: Ctrl+Alt+WHY.
•  The grind just got louder.
•  Monday’s energy is… concerning.
•  Did it just growl?
• This week aim is Monday!!!
•  Mondays ghost the weekend.
•  Brain not found. Try Tuesday.
•  Powered by coffee and complaints.
•  Monday’s theme? Chaos chic.
•  I speak fluent sarcasm today.
•  New day, same drama.
•  Just clocked in emotionally.
•  Monday smells like stress.
•  Smile? I barely blinked.
•  Weekend left me on read.
•  This vibe is not FDA-approved.
•  Plot twist: It’s still Monday.
•  My calendar hates me.

Monday dad Jokes

• What kind of shoes do frogs wear? Open toad.
• Did you hear about the red and blue ships that collided? All the sailors were marooned.
• My neighbor gave me a new roof for free. He said it was on the house.
• Did you hear about the teenager who failed his driving test? He thought it was a crash course.
• Where do surfers learn to surf? At boarding school.
• A duck walks into a bar and buys everyone a round. He tells the bartender, “Put it on my bill.”
• What has a spine but no bones? A book.
• What do you call a wizard who’s good with ceramics? Harry Pottery.
• Why did Marie Curie stop dating that guy? There was no chemistry.
• Did you hear about the nurse who didn’t want to become a doctor? She didn’t have the patients.
• Why did the tourist feel disappointed upon seeing the Liberty Bell? It wasn’t all it was cracked up to be.
• How did Vikings communicate with one another? By Norse code.
• How did Benjamin Franklin feel when he discovered electricity? He was shocked!
• Which is the worst sport to play? Bad-minton.
• Why don’t the other farm animals like playing basketball with pigs? They’re ball hogs.
• How do ghosts stay in shape? They exorcise.
• What do rabbits need after getting caught in the rain? A hare dryer.
• Why did the coach put the frog in the outfield? He’s really good at catching flies.
• What board game is popular in Prague? Czechers.
• What kind of shoes does a lazy person wear? Loafers.

Monday Jokes For Work

• Why did Monday get a promotion? Because it always starts the week off right!
• What did Monday say to the lazy day? “Time to get moving, the week is waiting!”
• Why was Monday so popular? It was the day of fresh starts and new opportunities!
• What did the morning coffee say to Monday? “Let’s brew up some motivation!”
• Why did Monday apply for a cooking class? It wanted to spice up the week!
• What did Monday tell the weekend? “You may be fun, but I bring the hustle!”
• Why did the computer love Mondays? It was a chance to reboot its creativity!
• What did the clock say to Monday? “Let’s make every second count this week!”
• Why did Monday start a blog? To share its tips for a productive week!
• What did the sun say to Monday? “Rise and shine, it’s a brand new week!”
• Why did the planner love Mondays? It was the perfect day to map out goals!
• What did the pencil say to Monday? “Let’s sketch out a great week ahead!”
• Why did the flower look forward to Mondays? It was time to bloom into something beautiful!
• What did the cat say to Monday? “Let’s pounce on those opportunities!”
• Why did Monday bring a backpack to work? It was loaded with potential!
• What did the rainbow say to Monday? “Let’s color the week with joy!”
• Why did Monday always have a smile? It believed in the power of new beginnings!
• What did the tree say to Monday? “Let’s grow together this week!”
• Why did the artist love Mondays? It was a blank canvas ready to be filled with creativity!
• What did the ocean say to Monday? “Let’s make waves of excitement this week!”

Jokes Hilarious Monday Quotes Funny

• Why did Monday bring a suitcase to work? It was ready for a week full of adventures!
• What did Monday say to the calendar? “Let’s fill this week with fun events!”
• Why do Mondays never get lost? Because they always follow the weekend’s map!
• What did one Monday say to another? “Let’s make this week unforgettable!”
• Why did the chair always look forward to Mondays? It was ready to support everyone again!
• What did the donut say to Monday? “Let’s sprinkle some joy into the week!”
• Why did the coffee file a complaint on Monday? It felt like it was being over-brewed!
• What did Monday tell the sun? “Shine bright, it’s time to wake up!”
• Why was Monday so excited? It had a full schedule of possibilities!
• What did the light bulb say to Monday? “You always brighten up my week!”
• Why did the cat love Mondays? It was a chance to pounce on new opportunities!
• What did Monday say to the alarm clock? “Thanks for waking me up to a fresh start!”
• Why did the rainbow love Mondays? It was a chance to color the week bright!
• What did the clock say to Monday? “Time to make some great memories!”
• Why did the pencil feel good on Monday? It was ready to draw new plans!
• What did the ocean say to Monday? “Let’s make waves this week!”
• Why did Monday join the gym? It wanted to work on its “weekend” body!
• What did the tree say to Monday? “Let’s branch out and grow this week!”
• Why did Monday always bring a smile? It believed in the power of fresh starts!
• What did the flower say to Monday? “Let’s blossom into something beautiful!”

Monday Jokes for Kids

• Why did the teddy bear say no to dessert on Monday? Because it was already stuffed!
• What did the banana say to Monday? “I’m ready to peel into the week!”
• Why did the student bring a ladder to class on Monday? Because they wanted to go to high school!
• What did the fish say when it got to school on Monday? “I’m hooked on learning!”
• Why did the cookie go to school on Monday? Because it wanted to be a smart cookie!
• What did the robot say to Monday? “Let’s compute some fun today!”
• Why did the kid bring a blanket to school on Monday? Because they wanted a cozy day!
• What did the grape say when it got stepped on Monday? Nothing, it just let out a little wine!
• Why did the chicken join a band on Monday? Because it had the drumsticks!
• What did the apple say to the orange on Monday? “You’re a-peeling!”
• Why did the pencil feel great on Monday? It was ready to draw a new adventure!
• What did the cloud say to Monday? “Let’s make it rain smiles today!”
• Why did the cat sit on the computer on Monday? It wanted to keep an eye on the mouse!
• What did the sun say to the kids on Monday? “Let’s shine bright and have a great day!”
• Why did the dinosaur love Mondays? Because it was time to roar into action!
• What did the cupcake say to Monday? “Let’s sprinkle some joy into the week!”
• Why did the owl hoot on Monday? Because it was excited for a new week!
• What did the rainbow say to the kids on Monday? “Let’s color the week with fun!”
• Why did the frog take a nap on Monday? It wanted to leap into the week refreshed!
• What did the star say to Monday? “Let’s shine bright all week long!”

FAQs about Monday Jokes